1.
Self
2.
Situation
3.
Others
In essence, his point is that while folks often worry
themselves with stuff that is outside their actual influence, one actually can
significantly effect a great deal by focusing on the things they truly can manage.
You are in charge of what you do, what you say, how you act (or react) and even
to a large degree how you think. In many situations, you can influence an
outcome dramatically by focusing on how you behave. While you cannot control
what others are doing, you can certainly maintain command of your actions and
thus the potential outcome of any given situation. My co-trainer made a remark
years ago while we were teaching on this subject that went something like
“always remember…it’s usually the second angry remark that causes an
argument or a fight…and you are in control of how you respond in any
situation.”
In any event, his point is usually that an individual will
be much more fulfilled if they focus on the things with which they actually
have influence, as opposed to lamenting the multitude of things over which they
have zero control. As often happens, I got a glimpse into this reality on the
flight home from Florida just yesterday.
Thanks to a first class upgrade (I got skunked on the trip
down and suffered in steerage with the masses), I was thankfully seated in row
1D far-removed from the flip-flop/cargo shorts/tank top wearing depravity of
the lower-life forms that make up the economy classless cabin behind me.
Shortly after being seated I was enjoying a clear plastic
cup of the carrier’s best boxed red wine (along with some Snyder’s of Hanover
pretzels) while watching the proletariat file back to the lower decks sporting
a combination of Florida’s best men’s beachwear and poorly coordinated women’s
print sun dresses and moo moos. Many of the passengers literally had bright
pink skin, that seemed to also indicate they’d somehow missed the 3-dacade memo
regarding the perils of overexposure of white fat to unregulated sunlight.
Thankfully, the parade of Hillbilly Hand-fishing extras was over…and we
prepared for takeoff.
Shortly after preparing the cabin doors for “cross-check”
and having the aircraft back away from the jet way, the First Class flight
attendant Abraham* got up and did something I’ve never witnessed before. He
stood in front of the cabin and gave a short little speech that went something
like this:
“Hello…can I please have your attention in the first
class cabin? Thank you…now this might sound corny, but my name is Abraham* and I
am a proud flight attendant for the world’s greatest airline. If you’ve
followed the news of late you know we’re also about to become the world’s
second largest airline, so I just want to thank you all for your continued
business…and for providing me with the privilege of serving you all. Our new
company is going to be great…and I’m looking forward to serving you as part of
this new airline. I have the greatest job in the world…it’s awesome
actually…and I just want to invite you to make sure I do all I can to serve you
on our two-and-a-half-hour flight. If you need anything…just let me
know.”
Now…first off, Abraham was dead on…it did sound pretty lame.
However, when he completed his little speech he received some pretty
enthusiastic applause (I shook my head in disgust)…and it was clear to me that
despite the corn…it was indeed appreciated. He then went on to call every first
class passenger by their last name (best I could tell after referring to his
passage list only once…and there were 16 of us), and he appeared to me to be
the quintessential pro. Abraham struck me as having as having a superb
attitude…committed to making the best of his job and staying firmly in command
of things he could control. He was so upbeat, and while I typically can’t stand
people like that, his infectious positive attitude was tough to ignore.
Because I was seated in row 1, I could also hear the
conversation he was having with fellow flight attendants. He mentioned that he
was the “running for union office” and was quizzing his co-workers about how to
better-serve their needs and asked for ways to ensure they had the information
they needed regarding the upcoming behemoth merger. In many ways Abraham
epitomized professionalism and was the perfect ambassador for his airline, his
union and his profession.
I took a minute to chat with him as we prepared to land and
asked him about the state of the industry. He responded by saying “it’s chaos”
and completely out of his control…but that he comes to work every day focusing
on making the things the best he can and that every day is a great day. “I have
the world’s best job he repeated.” “But you just said the environment is
insane” I responded… “how can it be a great job?” “I make it a great job” he
said. “I make it that way…every day.”
It’s not often I get to see a week’s worth of teaching
principles play out in front of my eyes…but it’s nice when it does. It’s also
helpful because while I like to think I’m at least adequate at training around
such values, I’m consitently pathetic at actually demonstrating their worth by example.
Abraham’s decision to focus on the things he can influence was a vivid reminder
that we are actually in control of ourselves…and that usually impacts a host of
things including our overall happiness...and sometimes even those around us.
It’s Friday, so if you’re lucky enough to have a couple of
days off thanks to the historical work of the labor movement, make the most of
the next two days by doing something you enjoy with the people you love. This
time on earth is a temporary gig, and as you get older you recognize the run is
much shorter than you initially thought. Make the time matter with the people
you love…it’s all in your control. Matter-of-fact…you are in command of
starting your weekend with some quality music by clicking right here.
*Name changed
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